Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Birds on a Wire

When I open my eyes in the morning I am usually looking out at the sky, part of my pear tree, a part of a neighbor's tree and the phone/power wires. It's become a regular feature of my day to lie there quietly and watch the sun (if it's around) brighten up the the little patch of sky and the various wires that make up modern society.

Often there is a squirrel doing his high wire act, flicking his tail and chattering. Today I saw a cardninal-there aren't as many in OKC as there were in Dallas. A crow landed on the top of the pole with a piece of a bagel and had himself quite a feast. A flock of really fat doves landed on the wires and made it bow with their weight.

Today is a day that will call for patience. I'm taking my Mom to John's old place to "help me" pack some of his stuff, which means I'll run around, do what I'm told until she's read to quit and then we'll leave and I'll go back later. No, it's not the most efficient way of doing things, but it lets her feel like she's a part of what is going on. And she needs to feel that way more than I need a single trip packing session.

This afternoon is the much anticipated water aerobics Christmas Party, so I will shave my legs and go. My plan is to float in the water as much as possible and let Mom socialize-there's a lot for her to tell people about-I'm not eating sweets, all my snakes died, my tree fell down, etc...

But the truth of my day is the best part was watching the birds on a wire, snuggling with my dogs. And I've got some projects in the works, a biking club for middle aged women (even got myself a sponsor) and some other things that are stirring. I'm learning to be a little selfish and keep some of those things back just for me, like the part about waking up and enjoying the sunshine on the wires.

It's the little things that keep us sane.

7 comments:

Mim said...

It's been a few days since reading posts but your's are so interesting. I have tried to write what I thinking about your posts, but the words won't come. I recently had a moment where I saw my mom as a "person" rather than my mother and that was an amazing experience. I've been treating her differently since then - yes she's still mom, but she's a normal human who needs love, warmth and compassion from everyone - including me. Somehow it was a breakthru moment for me- and I see that you are heading in the same direction. Embrace it - it's very liberating! (I still get frustrated...but I'm human too!)
Hope you get my meaning, Mim

Debra Kay said...

Mim, I totally get your meaning. Sometimes, we lose our parents long before they actually die. Maybe dementia is nature's way of preparing us for that-I hadn't thought of it that way before. I visit with a lot of adult "children" who are very frustrated and want to resolve old issues, etc, and for many of us, that isn't possible any longer.

Eeek, insight. Maybe the first step in being treated like an adult is treating your parents like adults and not parents. That's a heavy thought.

soulbrush said...

keep looking upwards and at that wire...........
children go through many changes as they grow older, but so too do their parents.
i have given you the True Blue Blogging Award (see my latest post)
big warm hugs

Michele said...

It's nice to have a few really special moments throughout the day - like my penguin visit yesterday. Enjoy every second of them.

kj said...

lovely seniments, debra kay. sunshine on the wires: if that's part of your wealth, abundance will always be yours!!

good attitude for packing up uncle john's.

Anonymous said...

like Mim there is so much here to think about and the words seem slow coming...

"so I will shave my legs and go"..
I know this post was about so much more than that, but it kind of sums it up for me...

Debra Kay said...

You know, yesterday was long, but not bad. I even hugged Mom at lunch and said "I'm really glad we are spending some time together just chilling, having fun"

I tried thinking of Mom as my "colleague" and she responded well to that and so did I. It was a totally different kind of energy.