The answer is so easy, i really think I said Aha! or Wow or something. You let go, not when you can see (with the rational mind) but when you can FEEL the cost of what hanging on to useless things is doing to you.
If you are hanging on to something-an old hurt, a pile of clothes, a grudge-flip things around and ask yourself "what is it costing me to keep this and could I replace it if I needed it later?"
3 comments:
I haven't been hanging onto the first baby I lost because I grieved hard and moved on. The second one though has been more tough. I found out this week that the baby was a girl, which really crushed me because I want another girl. I had a rough few days as I thought about it. But I did something that seemed to ease the pain. I named her. I had a name I loved from when I was a little girl and wanted to have five children ... a name Neil would never agree to in real life ... so I named my baby girl and somehow I feel better. Not ready to let go or move on but better.
Oh Deb, that's brilliant!! Love it, thank you!
How's Oliver??
Oliver is full speed ahead as always.
Michele, I have a lot more trouble with people than animals-not that I love people more, but animals seem more unafraid and accepting of death, so I feel like I should be too. Maybe this little girl's soul decided-OOOH, not yet. My own mother had two miscarriages, and as children do, my brother pointed out if either of them had made it I wouldn't be here, but as the first live birth and second, he was always assured of a "life". I used to ponder this, but having learned a great deal more about life, each one is so fraught with what ifs that you can'r really isolate a certain set of circumstances governing whether or not you are here. I really think all life is interwoven, so that you, me, all our daughters passed and present, are somehow a part of one big life force. Nothing is ever really lost.
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