I spent all day on the phone training to be a group leader. I learned all about Weight Loss Surgery, Nutritional Requirments and Group Dynamics. It really was interesting. My group, The Virtual Bike Club probably won't discuss any of it, we just encourage each other to ride our bikes.
Then I got a lead on a company that is hiring people to work from home-I'd like a little part time something something just to add structure and variety whilst I figure out my life's purpose. I don't think my life's purpose will end up being a customer service rep, but it would provide a little cash, a little structure and maybe quiet the speculation about what it is I DO all day...
I have turned a corner of sorts. I bought a ventless natural gas heater, and once it is installed I will not be a refugee from my own home. It is being delivered next week, so I went down tonight to have a conversation with my parents. I said "I bought a gas heater and I'd like your opinion on where to have it installed" I let them talk for a bit about generators and carbon monoxide. Strangely, it was Mom that was frantic, trying to imagine what it would look like and where it would go. (It's cute, it looks like a cast iron stove).
She fell into her standard "you don't need it" diatribe, stating "I have lived here all my life and I've NEVER been without electricity, and if I was, I'd just GO somewhere..." and I turned that corner. I say turned the corner because before I would have gotten frutrasted and snapped. Instead I looked her right in the eye and said very quietly, "Well, I've been here 6 months and I've had to leave my house twice. I've lost thousands of dollars in snakes, and easily spent another thousand in kennel bills. You are welcome to come down to my house if you ever need to, but I'm getting a heater and I wish I had bought one back in the summer when I was thinking about it."
And that was that. The world did not end, I was invited to lunch tomorrow.
Sometimes people can't live beyond their own experience. I am a person who lives on other's experiences to some degree, but I'm learning to fall back on my own experience for certain things. Like back up heat. And I'm learning not to apologize for it.