Friday, October 26, 2007

Thoughts on Bravery

Sometimes bravery isn't diving into the unknown. Sometimes bravery is diving in when you know it's going to be a shitstorm.

Is it brave to try try again, or just stupidity?

I was really bummed out today-the lunch just wore me out. And, I started revisiting many failed things-some of which are chronicled in this blog. I seem to be in a cycle of starting, but never finishing.

My scotty morphed into a cubicle and then into a tent with a stove. I missed the only two camping trips I signed up for and I almost let my sister on the fly membership lapse.

So, in a absolute act of stupidity, bravery, desperation, I went and bought a new travel trailer, and this time made arrangements to have my truck configured with the proper hitches and towing stuff. I got insurance and the whole 9 yards-no sneaking into the whole thing with a bargain basement thing that won't be road worthy. In other words, I set myself up for travel trailer success.

And, in another act of self preservation, I haven't told a soul-or rather I haven't told my parents. And I'm not willing to share the decoration of said trailer, or disclose future destinations or prices or anything. This is one thing that is just for me. I've made arrangements to park it at a trailer parking place. I have plans for trips and potential story ideas-in fact, this blog will take place in part from the road.

Now, some of Daddy's criticisms of the previous incarnations were valid-it wasn't the safest thing on the road. But the one thing I'm not willing to have critiqued at the moment is whether I deserve it, should have it or should ever even drive it off the lot. No one gets to decide that but me. No one.

So, piss on scotty. I'm beaming myself up.

4 comments:

Mim said...

Hi Debra - I love your profile, very funny and honest. Hope you kept the trailer, I've always wanted one but it was never the "right" time. Thanks for you the comment on my blog - I don't think I was profound as a 6 year old; I think I was scared to death by the authorotative figures telling me about "the bad place" !
Take care

Debra Kay said...

I'm picking her up on Tuesday. I had fear, buyers remorse, what the hell am I doing, all the above, but I'm going to go get the trailer.

Forever Young said...

i am so proud of you, doing it for you, this is what getting older is all about -saying f....off world, i can and will make my own decisions.

Debra Kay said...

Sometimes you just gotta.