Thursday, July 31, 2008

Why is being nice so damn hard?

OK-I sent the offer into the Universe via e-mail-I'd be willing to trade the bike for a Jeep in exchange for utter silence on the matter for now and forever more, amen.

There comes a time when you have to put what you want (a little fun) up against how much worry it will cause. I'm learning that fun needs to be found in activities away from 49th street if I don't want anyone to worry. It's kind of like being gay, only without the sex. Maybe they will have a Deb Pride week or a parade in my honor.

In the movies, if someone gives in, sometimes the other parties say "oh, we were wrong, you should go do what you want to do....." but I'm not holding my breath-yet I will uphold my offer if it is accepted.

My folks are just too old to expect sweeping change-and they are making little changes so now I have to be fucking big and put my own ego on the chopping block too. That probably comes with living in close proximity to one's family, which I haven't done in 20 something years-so forgive me if I have trouble figuring it all out.

In Corporate America we called it picking your battles, and I was a master at it for the most part. We'll see how it works on 49th street.

5 comments:

human being said...

hope it works very well...

once i expected my family to change... then i changed my mind and i changed: i started not to expect them to change or to understand me... the result was more respect on their part... and more being 'me' on my part...

of course it took a long time...

wish you the best....
love

Debra Kay said...

I think your method is a good one. It doesn't hurt me to yield every now and then.

soulbrush said...

id depends on what your principles are, sometimes yielding is bloody hard!growl!

Debra Kay said...

In this case it was not just the yielding-but that it took several days of bartering, etc. to fix the mess once I decided to yield. What a pain in the ass.

Although-in my great scorebook, I don't blame anyone for the clean up nor even really for the mess either. I couldn't help wanting a motorcycle, the family couldn't help worrying about it-the jeep is a splendid solution.

An added benefit is the silence-can you hear it? No talk about what I need or don't need.

Prozac said...

Yes. Picking my battles. I'm shit at picking my battles. Something I need to improve on.