Is it enough to feel grateful for what we have?
What purpose does guilt serve?
Once upon a time I thought that was my conscience, my "guilty conscience", but now I think it has nothing to do with conscience or remorse and everything to do with fear.
Perhaps guilt is fear, after the fact.
That's pretty pointless, isn't it?
11 comments:
guilt is useless
trying to justify yourself is useless
fear is real!
No need to try and justify yourself - when you argue with yourself, which is what you are doing, you are only getting one side of the argument from both sides. Just relax with your thoughts and enjoy the good things.
When I argue with myself, I am usually arguing with what I think someone might think about what I'm doing. Obviously, I'm fine with it, or I wouldn't be doing it.
It's amazing how much time/energy we (I) waste on things that just don't matter. And if you are really awesome at it, like me, you can finally get the energy up to DO something, only to beat yourself down again and again.
Honestly, I bet there isn't a transgression that I have trangressed that I haven't worked myself over about 10 times at least.
I think I should impose a statute of limitations on mauling myself-only once per event-if I start to maul myself over something I've already mauled on, I must stop immediately. Hell, if you are constantly mauling over the what has happened, and what MIGHT happen (another good topic I get a lot of maulage out of), then nothing NEW can ever happen for which you can transgress and be mauled for.
Hell, maybe that's why we do it-we'll just beat ourselves up over things we've already done cause we KNOW we can survive that.
Wow, I just started two consecutive sentences with Hell. Maybe I should change the second hell to a damn.....LOL.
Great post!
So true these words
HCM btw
It's like reading my own words here today! I have a friend who can't believe how much time I waste beating myself up. She doesn't understand what good can come from it. Uh, that would be none! I just always get so disappointed in myself that it trips me up from moving forward in some areas of my life. I'm working on it though. I really am.
debra kay, guilt is a worthless emotion. it ususally means "I want" or "I wish" and that is what to pay attention to, because that you can do something about. but to just feel bad from guilt, it doesn't help you OR the object of your guilt.
that's my two cents.
What purpose does guilt serve?
All emotions are important, but you only feel guilt if you are doing something wrong. So all you need to do is figure out what it is and correct it and it will go away.
Guilt - I wrote about it today also. I try to squash it down, but sometimes it raises it's head and hisses at me (sorry for the snake reference, it's all religion...adam and eve and the snake and all that stuff during this week).
The benefit of guilt is that I get alot of housecleaning done during that time, and when I stop feeling guilty I feel great.
I think the feeling I am talking about isn't true guilt. I rarely regret things. What I'm really feeling is, like KJ says "I wish someone would approve and encourage me". I am getting better (much) about the justifying every action thing. It's such a waste (just like guilt)....if I've already done it, I clearly felt it was something necessary or at least ok.
While the need to explain everything is a woman thing, I think it might be a socially conditioned thing. For instance, my parent's would never feel the need or even think to "approve or disapprove" of a vehicle my brother purchased, or a new pair of shoes or whatever. I think they are becoming more aware of this but have no idea why it is happening (their parents probably did the same thing).
Moving back to Oklahoma has been a real eye opener-just like in a sci fi story, when you move into a parallel universe, their rules apply. But I never really follow the rules I don't like, and this one sucks so I am not listening....LOL. Not much has changed after all.
I think the feeling I am talking about isn't true guilt. I rarely regret things. What I'm really feeling is, like KJ says "I wish someone would approve and encourage me". I am getting better (much) about the justifying every action thing. It's such a waste (just like guilt)....if I've already done it, I clearly felt it was something necessary or at least ok.
While the need to explain everything is a woman thing, I think it might be a socially conditioned thing. For instance, my parent's would never feel the need or even think to "approve or disapprove" of a vehicle my brother purchased, or a new pair of shoes or whatever. I think they are becoming more aware of this but have no idea why it is happening (their parents probably did the same thing).
Moving back to Oklahoma has been a real eye opener-just like in a sci fi story, when you move into a parallel universe, their rules apply. But I never really follow the rules I don't like, and this one sucks so I am not listening....LOL. Not much has changed after all.
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